OMG - Why do people have to SUCK so much?!?

So things didn't work out between me and M. There were some things that truly irked the hell out of me, like how everytime I would say anything he'd reply with, "You tell me how it is." OMG, so frustrating! Oh, and it was so sweet of him to drive me to the urgent care center when I was sick, but to take pictures while I was in triage - not a good idea! I mean, did you see how quickly my pulse jumped? There were just a lot of things. I wasn't feeling it. It felt like I was hanging out with a friend rather than a boyfriend, and his constant talk about wanting to get bigger (more muscular, not fatter) turned my stomach. I just don't like big, muscular guys. I'm not attracted to that. It's my opinion and I feel I am entitled to it.

I wanted to be mature about things. I wanted to sit down, face to face, and let him know that I just wasn't feeling anything more than friendship towards him, and that I would love to continue to be friends because he really does have a good heart. That didn't work out either. We were bickering back and forth on Facebook (the Devil!). I wasn't being my normal charming self, I'll admit it. I was kinda cold, but at least then it wouldn't seem like it came from left field when I dumped him. So we were going back and forth; he asked if there was something wrong, I told him I wasn't going to lie. He asked if it was about him, I told him I was not having that discussion online. He called when I was in the Day Care picking up my kid, so I wasn't able to answer the phone. Then he left a snarky message, something along the lines of; Call me and tell me what the fuck is up. That pissed me off, so I replied with, when I'm ready to talk I'll fucking call you. Then he said I was playing games, that the truth finally came out. What truth might that be, I asked. He's like, it's not that serious, if you wanna end things just say goodbye - so I said goodbye and he unfriended me. Real mature, right?

So being the kind hearted person that I really am, I felt bad for the way things ended. I was able to send him a message last night telling him that he really is a great guy, and I just wasn't feeling it, the whole thing. Then he comes back, insinuating that I left him for someone else (in my mind, I think he was referring to C, since he loved to bring his name up). I wrote back that I didn't leave him for anyone else, blah blah blah, if he ever needed a friend, I was here. He said it was too hard right now, but maybe in the future. All in all, a nice conversation.

Now, not only am I kind hearted, but I'm also very curious by nature. I looked at his profile, just to see if he was talking shit about me, and he was. Around the same time I sent him that message, he changed his status to: "here is some words of advise. If you would like to stay my friend, and have me talk to you. Don't you fucking ever direct the word love towards me." First, it irked me that I wasn't able to comment and correct his grammar, but whatever. It pissed me off. Talk about being a two-faced bitch. So I decided to be snarky and changed my status (we're not friends, but we have a lot of mutual friends who are aware of the situation, and I felt I had to defend myself, lest I look like a complete bitch) - my status was "Newsflash: I never claimed to love you, not even close. So how 'bout you put your big boy pants on and deal. It didn't work out, get over it." Probably not the most mature way of handling it, but I felt a little bit better putting it out there. Plus, I have my girls on my side confirming that I never said love, just like, and we all know that we admit that kinda stuff to our girlfriends before we'd say it to our significant others.

So anyway, I thought that I'd be nice and continue to be friends with him at some point in the future, but it's so not worth it. There are plenty of other guys out there for me, and I am going to have my fun with them. I mean, I never really said, "hey, let's be bf/gf", he just kinda decided that out of no where, after hanging out twice and talking on the phone a few times.

M - if you're reading this - not everyone who hangs out with you wants to be your girlfriend. You can't force these things, and that's exactly what you were doing. You were moving way too fast for me, and that coming from someone who can fall in love at the drop of a hat means a lot. I hope with your next girl you take things slow, and don't try to piss her off with the ninja shit when she's so sick that she has to be in the urgent care center. Oh, and don't be a dick when she's trying to be nice and mature about a breakup. Trust me, I can be the sweetest person in the world; I'd give you my last penny if you truly needed it, the shirt of my back - but once you cross me and piss me off, I guaran-fucking-tee that you will never have experienced pure bitchiness and ice cold cruelty from anyone like you'd get from me. You want to stay on my good side.